First Date Mistakes That Are Killing Your Game
No one wants to make a bad first impression, but a first date can bring out the worst in us without conscious effort. Take a deep breath, and think through your nerves. Concentrate on your very best personal qualities, and consider these suggestions when making a good impression.
Bad Manners Make A Bad First Impression
This should go without saying, but a brush up on Emily Post’s Etiquette might be in store if you’re showing up late on a regular basis, or staring at your phone through an entire dinner. While it’s OK to take an emergency work call or get stuck in traffic on 7th Avenue, disregarding your date’s valuable time is not OK.
First dates usually take place in places where waiters are involved – so make your best first impression and be polite. Observe how your date interacts with service people, but know that you’ll be tested as well. Some red flags are:
- Never saying “please” or “thank you”
- Speaking condescendingly to a waiter
- Tipping less than 15 percent, or not at al
Other bad habits are less obvious, and depend on the mood of the date. One of the worst first impressions you can make is over-drinking. Loosen up or ease your nerves with a drink or two, but remember that this is not spring break – don’t throw back shots of tequila like you’re on the Jersey Shore. If you’re considering going home with your new flame, getting drunk could easily kill your chances of going home with a date.
Sex On The First Date
Thinking about going home with your date? Don’t bring up your ex.
Maybe you’ve been single for a while, or maybe you just got dumped. Still, this is not the time to open up about how broken your ex made you – and that sob story will definitely not inspire a pity fuck, or make the best first impression.
Be careful. There’s a difference between acting humble and projecting low self-esteem.
Over-Talking. Or, Shut The F*ck Up
What the heck is meta-dating, you ask. Well, it sounds a lot like talking about the date while you’re actively on the date. Or talking about how bad you are at dating while you’re on said date. Again, the point of a first impression is presenting the best version of yourself – you wouldn’t, for example, enter an interview by listing off your weaknesses.
Being overly self-effacing or having low self-esteem is often cited as a top relationship deal breaker for many singles. So don’t emphasize your shaky nerves or obsession with analyzing text messages during a first date.
Some tips for making the best first impression on a date are:
- Listen, don’t talk
- Ask your date questions
- Don’t be afraid to make eye contact
- Smile often
Bragging On The First Date. Or Ever.
Although low self-esteem can be a turn off, bragging can be just as unappealing. If you’re confused about this balancing act, it might be time for a dating coach – or a strong look in the mirror. While it’s OK to be proud of your accomplishments, bragging about how much money you make, perceiving a variety of career types as superior, or being overtly classist definitely won’t win someone’s heart.
Lying, especially, is never OK. We all tell white lies on a first date, but showing up in a business suit “after work” and claiming you’re an investment banker – when you’ve been grinding coffee at Starbucks all day – is bad practice. And dating karma will always come back to get you.
Prepping For Your First Date
Making a bad first impression is easy, but following these simple suggestions can make you stand out from the crowd – and, if you’re lucky, lead to a second date.
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